Wednesday, July 21, 2010


I hate the Iphone 4G Facetime know what I'm talking about...the ones where two cute in love people chat with each other using the phone's video feature...face time. Yeah. Those. I find them incredibly annoying. As if only people with these sweet, syrupy, lovey, dovey, relationships would be using this feature. Ummm...hello...I can think of a ton of other uses for this video chat thingie. And none of them are very sweet...ahem...well...let's keep this PG. But I can also think of situations in which this feature could go horribly awry.

For instance...just saying...we have all experienced the drunk texting phenomenon. Imagine what one of these drunk texts could turn into if they where video chats. HORROR and REGRET, that's what it would turn into. Also lets add some SHAME to that mix. Which would mean I would have to use the video chat thing to call up my therapist and discuss these feelings while driving to McDonald's for a coke and french fries.

I do think, however,this feature would be way fun if I could video chat with say...Verizon...cause then I could really show them hell hath no fury like a woman shuffled through numerous departments and countries in order to track down why exactly she was overcharged for her cellphone bill. But I guess I can't do that until they get the Iphone.

Other times this feature would be fun:

when I'm at Target and I want my best friend to see all the crap I've placed in the cart when I just went in for shampoo,

showing my mom that I actually vacuumed when we are having a passive aggressive discussion about money/my weight/my dating situation,

on snow days...enough said,

and finally I would most enjoy this feature when I am busy looking for items I've notoriously lost or misplaced.

Imagine if you will, friends and family, how much fun it would be if I was able to have you assist me in searching for things...for instance where I parked my car. I would simply call you up and hold you up so you could look around with me. Like they say...two sets of eyes are better then one.

Steve Jobs, could you make a commercial that speaks to me...a young, flaky, neurotic, unsentimental single woman? For god sakes, I'm going to have to buy my houseplant an Iphone so we can video chat from the bedroom to the kitchen. It can call me up and show me via video that I have forgotten to water it for the past two weeks.

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